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Lately it’s been tenuous with us.  We’ve been having to refrain from sex to give my poor little pussy a break.  It’s been 6 days since the last time He penetrated me and to make things even more interesting, mother nature decides it’s her time to visit.

After a lot of bathing and cleaning i am ready for Him and meet Him in the bedroom.  My stomach is nervous, i hope things go well and we can re-connect.

He is laying on the bed, legs slightly spread and He looks at me, with that lustful look.  i lay next to Him with my head on His stomach and my mouth inches away from His cock.  i slowly begin to lick His head and take it into my mouth.  He softly sighs and places His hand onto my head, softly petting my hair.  i start to suck Him deeper into my mouth, wanting to please my Sir and make Him nice and hard so he can fuck me.

As i feel him grow in my mouth he commands me to “gag yourself on my cock.”  Eagerly i obey and as His head hits the back of my throat tears spring to my eyes.

“Good girl.  Again.”

i follow His instructions to the letter and i feel Him getting thicker in my mouth.  my pussy starts to get wet and the desire to have Him fuck me grows to a burning need.  He begins to spank my arse as i continue to suck on his cock.

“Get on your knees, on the bed,” He commands.

Placing a towel down on the bed i eagerly get into position.  His hands caress my backside, lightly tracing the curves and then *smack*.  Again, His hands caress me and then *smack*smack*.

Softly i moan.  Holy crap how i have missed feeling his hands on me.  Each spank is comforting and reminds me i am His.

*SMACK*  He spanks harder.

As i continue to moan and revel in the pleasure of each spank He sets a steady rhythm.  Alternating between globes.  Finally with one hard blow i hear Him groan.

He gets up and heads for our little back of tricks.  It contains a belt, an array of clothespins, various attachments for our Wahl, a blindfold and two vibrators (a smaller green one and a larger pink one).  It’s only when i feel it against my skin, i know He’s brought the pink one.  Slowly he starts to work it into my tight little pussy.

“I hope your little cunt is ready for this.  Is it?”  He quizzes.

Sighing i quickly answer, “Yes, yes it is Sir.”

He begins to move the vibrator in and out of me.  Stopping momentarily, then beginning again.  With it deep inside me i feel His hand spank my left cheek, hard.  Before i have time to catch my breath, He does the same to the right cheek.

My hips sink down toward the mattress, delighting in the pleasure of the toy stretching my pussy and the heat coming off my freshly spanked arse.

“Where is your other toy?”  He asks.

“um, Sir, here on the side of the bed.”

“And all of it’s attachments?”

“in the bag Sir.”

“Are you sure?  I don’t think they are where you think they are.”

My mind races.  Shit!  Where are they?  Think!

“Could they be in this towel?”

“Yes Sir, they are.  i accidentally left them there after cleaning them.  i’m sorry Sir.”

“Get up on your knees.  I though I told you to be on your knees.”

“Yes Sir, i’m sorry.”

*SMACK*

Without a word He slides the Wahl under me, positions it onto my clit and switches it on.  my mind starts to spin as my body begins racing toward orgasm.  He suddenly takes out the vibrator and turns off the massager.

“Flip over on to your back”

Without a word i quickly obey.  He moves the massager back to my clit and turns it on.  It feels so good, but the need to cum races back to the forefront of my mind.  i keep repeating to myself, i mustn’t cum with out permission, i mustn’t cum without permission.  Then He begins to fuck me with the pink vibrator as He massages my clit.

“Oh Sir,” i mewl.

“Yes?”

“Sir please?”

“Please what little girl?”

“Please, may i cum Sir?”

“Yes you may.”

As i begin to shake, i breathlessly thank Sir for letting me cum.

“Good girl”

As my orgasm fades He continues to slowly fuck me with the vibrator while holding the massager close against my clit.  The feelings are so overwhelming and i desperately need to cum again.

“please Sir, may i cum?”

“Yes you may”

As i cum again my clit becomes ultra sensitive and i cannot take the relentless vibration.  i start to plead again.

“Sir, it’s too much”

“What’s too much little girl”

“My clit Sir, i can’t take any more.  Please”

“Do you want me to stop.”

“Yes Sir, please.”

“No”

my mind whizzes around as my body strains against the persistent pressure of the massager against my clit is too much to bear.  i cum again.

“Did you just cum again?”

“Y-yes Sir”

“Good girl”

Through tears i beg again.

“Please Sir, it’s too much”

“NO”

He continues to toy with me, moving the massager around my clit and then on top of my clit.  And i begin to cry.  He resolutely keeps the pressure on my clit, reminding me that i am not done until He says i’m done.  And that this is for His pleasure and when He’s had his fill, i will get relief.

Suddenly He switches off the massager and i feel Him climb up over me, mounting me.  He positions the tip of his cock against my tight entrance and pushes.  i whimper, enjoying the feel of His cock entering me.  This is always one of my favorite moments with Him.  Those first few slow strokes as His cock explores my wetness, slowly stretching me.

He begins to push deeper into me.  Our groans filling the room.  His rhythm picks up and He slams His rock hard cock deep inside me, to the hilt.

Due to a shaving mishap, every time He penetrates me to the hilt i feel the stubble poke into me, like little pins.  Without thinking i softly mutter, “pokies”.  And He stops.  My mind screams at myself, dammit!  i shouldn’t have said anything.  He slowly pulls out of me and goes soft.  i lay there stunned, saddened and guilt-ridden knowing i have disappointed my Sir.

We try to talk about it briefly.  He then nudges my bottom and tells me to get cleaned up and ready for bed.  As i am in the shower i softly cry.  The pain and disappointment of not being able to satisfy my Sir surrounds me.  Returning to our bedroom i find Him dozing off.  i turn off the light and crawl into bed, crying myself to sleep.

In the middle of the night, i wake up laying on my side feeling Him pressing His body against my back.  His arms slowly, tightly wrapping around me holding me close.  And He begins to grind His cock against my arse.  Pushing and grinding roughly.  Making sure i feel every inch of Him as He grows harder and thicker.

Again roughly He bucks against me.  Softly i moan desperately wishing He’d peel my panties off and fuck me rough and hard – reminding me i’m His fucktoy.  He continues to grind and push and buck His hips against my soft arse.  His grunts of desire are met with my sighs of pleasure.  i love it when He wants to roughly lose Himself in me.  i can feel myself get wet.

Suddenly He gets up and i think He’ll order me to suck His cock or strip for Him.  Instead He starts rummaging around our little bag of tricks.  He pulls out the lotion and without a word heads to the bathroom.  Quietly i wait for a moment, then quickly realize He’s pleasuring Himself to release.  Just as i get up to offer a hand or a mouth, i hear the taps on the sink turn on.

i softly sigh and ask, “Are you finished? i was coming in to help.”

“No.  I didn’t cum.” He says.

And i know why.  Again i have failed Him.  The pain and disappointment in not being able to please Him hits me like a ton of bricks and i crawl back into bed and weep.  This is the thing that a lot of folks who live the D/s lifestyle don’t talk or write about; the physical and emotional pain you feel as a submissive when you let your Sir down.

At times those feelings can be so overwhelming because the urge to please isn’t just some whim, it’s a deep need.  And while i have only been ‘plugged-in’ to my submissiveness for a short period of time those feelings of knowing that i have not pleased my Sir is tremendous, as is the love i feel for Him.